Monday, October 28, 2013

My mom

Ya'll know I am an open book, easily share my heart & a firm believer in the power of prayer. Not everyone agrees with that so I don't always share the ups & downs about mom. For two weeks those prayers carried us thorough Abe's hospital stay. Our faith was tested along with the strength of our family. God prevailed. We need those prayers now please. 

While we were there I struggled with wanting & needing to be home with my family especially my mom. I don't understand God's plan & I try not to figure it out. It's His plan & He is in control. 

Yesterday I was dressed & ready to go to church. Marlee Anne had said she had missed 7 Sundays so I knew we needed to go. At 9:00 Kendra text me to ask if she could take Marlee Anne. I really wanted to go see mom but didn't want Marlee Anne to miss church yet again. So thankful for Kendra. 

I call mom every morning but it's getting harder & harder for her to talk. When I got there I noticed that she wasn't able to smile. I talk to my sister or brother everyday to see how her day is but I don't get to go over & see her. The mom I saw was not what I was expecting. So many little things had changed. 

I see pieces of her going away more and more. I feel terribly guilty that I can't be there to take care of her. Debbie & Bryant have so much on them. I miss knowing what she is doing every minute but I am not sure my heart could handle this. I go to bed praying she has a restful & pain free night. Partly for her & for my sister & brother so they can rest. I wake up & the first thing on my mind is my mom. Did she make it through the night? Did she sleep? Oh I don't understand this journey!

Please pray for my sister & brother as they care for mom. Please pray for their health & strength. Also please pray for peaceful & pain free days for mom. Thank you!!!