Ya'll I haven't shared these feelings because I thought they would pass quickly as they usually do. I think they are lingering because I have been so sick & I am exhausted.
Anyway I have this heavy on my heart feeling the older I get about taking care of my children in later years. Then I worry about what will happen to them if something happens to Mike & I.
I know without a doubt that God has this under control. It's all part of His plan but sometimes, like now it's hard to let go. It's overwhelming to think of taking care of 3 children with extensive medical issues who are completely dependent as we get older & they grow.
I try hard not to dwell on it & most times if it comes to mind it does pass quickly. I thought maybe sharing my thoughts & feelings might help them pass & get off my mind.
This is lots of rambling because I can not get my thoughts in order. I think I need to sleep.
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3 comments:
Your not alone!!! even those of us with out special needs children (or young adults!) feel the SAME way!!!~~ When you look death and its young death(for me this year any way) in the face it makes ALL those feelings just JUMP up in your brain !!~~~ Sleep Kelli sleep it helps ..... A new day will come and in the end we will hug our children whom we shall worry about for a life time BUT grasp that smile the twinkle int their eye it makes night like your having BEARABLE!! <3 to you !!
Hi Mary Elizabeth and Micheala
My name is Jenna and I came across your site. You are an amazing, precious gift and special earthly angel. You are full of courageous, strength, determination, and fight. You are a brave warrior, smilen champ and an inspiration. You are a princess hero, beautiful trooper, and a tough cookie. You are full of life, spunk, joy, smiles, and sunshine. You have taught everyone about life, and the gift of life. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/champ291 I love it when people sign my guestbook.
You don't know me, but I am an old high school classmate of Mike's & just "friend requested" him on Facebook. I started not to because we weren't that close, but now I know why I did. In the couple of minutes I spent looking at his page, I was tremendously blessed. I would like to return the favor and offer you both some encouragement. Although there is much that we won't ever understand on this side of heaven, their is no doubt that you have been divinely assigned to the care of your beautiful children. That said, even with your great attitudes, I know there are times of great trial. It's easy for us to salute you, wish you the best, and then go on with our comparably trouble-free lives. I want to tell you that "He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it." He knows your every concern and truly wants you to "cast all your cares upon Him. For He cares for you." He did not design us to carry the weight & stress that we often try to bear. God knows the care that your children need & does not want you to "worry about tomorrow". I humbly encourage you to truly "trust in the Lord with all your heart & lean not on your own understanding. But in all your ways acknowledge Him & He WILL direct your path." "You are the righteousness of God in Christ" & the Bible says "the footsteps of the righteous are ordered by God". I absolutely DO NOT know what y'all go through & CANNOT relate, other than being able to attest to the fact that we both serve a God that is "able to do exceedingly abundantly, above all that we can ask or think." He is forever faithful. Be encouraged that He always has your best interest at heart & knows your every need. He will really "provide for all of your needs according to His riches in glory, by Christ Jesus." I pray God's richest blessings on your family. May "the peace of God guard your hearts & minds in Christ Jesus." He has promised to "keep in perfect peace, (those) who's minds are stayed upon Him." I curse any attempt of the enemy to bring discouragement, worry or fear. "You were not given a spirit of fear, but one of power, love & a sound mind." I pray for your sleep to be sweet & always refreshing. God has equipped you two for this & will "never leave you nor forsake you." I pray for a new and fresh revelation for both of you of the abundant life Jesus came to give us, even in your struggles. Humbly, I encourage you: "Do not grow weary in well-doing. For in due season, you will reap if you faint not." Continue to fulfill your assignment "heartily as unto the Lord". Always remember that the precious Holy Spirit was given to us as a deposit when Jesus went to be with the Father. He is always willing and able to help you with your every need. He is our Comforter, Helper, Teacher. I pray that your awareness of Him, & His ministry in your lives, will be heightened in a new & special way today. As I said in the beginning, "He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it."
God's richest blessings to your family.
Jim
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