You can take that subject line however you would like. Right now I feel like a camel. Even though I really don't know much about them I see them as being fairly tough guys. Able to with stand a load. I imagine them though taking about all they can take. What will break their backs, their strength, their endurance & their spirit? What will be the final thing that does them in? Probably nothing huge I imagine. I am thinking just a toothpick. A little splinter. Just something really small.
Well to get on with the news I got today. The baby has an enlarged kidney. The ultrasound will not show the reason for this. Once the baby is born they will then ultrasound his kidneys and see what's going on. There are a couple of things that it could be. A blockage and his kidney just not emptying. Or bladder reflux where the bladder backs up into the kidney.
We are claiming that it's NOTHING!!! Even though I feel knocked down at this moment. Mike had a meeting he could not miss so I was by myself at the appt. I was blown away when I heard these words. My rock wasn't there and it was tough. I was once again reminded why God brought Mike and I together. Well even though I am feeling this way now I KNOW without a doubt that I serve a God that is in the miracle business. I know without a doubt that this baby can be born without anything being wrong.
I don't even want to go into the fact that I am sure there's an easy fix. Send him to a pediatric urologist. I can hear the laughs and sighs of unbelief now from our friends that understand the "one more thing" attitude I have right now. Of course we don't have a pediatric urologist on The Hopkins staff right now. Why not add it right?
I have to admit my No Matter What Happens attitude is being greatly tested right now. I don't understand why God allows things. Good and bad. Each day I am so overwhelming blessed by the most amazing family that I could never even have dreamed them up. I wouldn't have dreamed them up because looking at them through my eyes like those of the world's I would have missed all the blessings. Thankfully I see them through God's eyes. I see the perfection he has created. OK so I will give him credit for all the wonderful blessings in my life. However right now he is allowing this. I hate this! I do not want this.
I know it's not obvious but I honestly have been praying since I left the doctor's office about this. I thought that I could get these thoughts out where they would make sense. It seems like I am rambling. I just figured this would be the easiest way to share this news than to try and explain while I was crying on the phone with those of you that have called to check.
On a side note they did not weigh the baby. Right now we are just waiting to see when he will decide to make his appearance. Unless of course the OB decides to induce. I see him again on Monday. Tuesday is Abraham Lincoln's birthday so Mike thought it would be neat if his little Abe was born that day. We shall see!
Right now just please pray that this is just a glitch in the ultrasound. Please pray that everything is fine with our precious baby. Please pray for peace for Mike & I. If you have read this far thank you for wading through my thoughts and allowing me to share them with you.
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