Two weeks

Two weeks ago I was making this drive in the opposite direction. I was so worried about Abe & what was going on with his little body. What was he fighting? What was causing so many seizures?

On the way I started praying that God was ahead of us. Literally making a path through traffic for us. The wind was blowing the van so hard. I prayed that the wind would stop. I could still see the trees blowing but the van was no longer swaying. No longer hard to control.

Those of you that have experienced the hospital, ER or any doctors & nurses know how important it is for God to go ahead of you & put the right people in place. As soon as we pulled into the parking lot I could see he had gone ahead of us because of the parking attendant & the parking place.

I walked through the doors of the ER carrying Abe & a trauma nurse walked out. She took one look at him, made a quick call & we were in the trauma room. Like a well rehearsed play the doctors, nurses, respiratory team & techs moved about working on Abe.

After what seemed like an eternity of labs, X-rays & test the doctor said I am stumped. He was stable enough to move to the PICU.

Same thing there. God's steps ahead of us were in place & very visible. The PICU team got to work right away getting him settled & getting him comfortable.

The next two weeks were one of those roller coaster you would like to skip even if the wait time is short. Thankful that God carried us through.

On the drive home 2 weeks of tears flowed. It was a mixture of scared, worry, fear, joy, blessings, peace & so much more mixed in. After only a few minutes of crying I began to sob because the joy of The Lord & the love of God overwhelmed me. This is so not the perfect life I had dreamed of. God is so much bigger than that. On the way home I could not wait to he with my perfect family God created.

I cried also for the 2 little lives that were lost on either side of us while we were there. I pray for their families. I pray for Jack & Kemper as they are still in the hospital fighting a good fight. I pray for Mackenzie as she had another blood clot this morning but survived it. I pray for the families that went home while we were there. I pray for the families that are still in their struggles. I pray for the doctors & nurses & the rest of the medical team as they help to heal these children. May the feel God's guidance & allow him to use them.

The amount of thank you notes that I need to send out is unreal. Sadly they will most likely get placed on the back burner for now. Please know that our thanks is great to those of you that love, supported & prayed for us during this struggle. We are thankful that after all these years we have family & friends that haven't walked away & haven't given up on fighting with us. We couldn't do this without ya'll!!! Thank you so very much!!! Now go hug your loved ones. Tell them that you love them & make sure they know God as their personal savior.

With much love & gratefulness!

It's me again God

Do you ever feel like saying it's me again God? Even though I know He is wanting & waiting for me to come to Him I feel like saying that.

Well here I am again. Sitting in the PICU watching Abe's numbers on the monitors. Every doctor that comes in says they are baffled. They just don't know.

His seizures have thankfully slowed down some. He is on 10 liters of high flow oxygen in hopes of giving his body some rest. It's working so hard to fight whatever is going on in there. His temp is 103. There is a war raging on inside.

As I watched his body have seizure after seizure back to back I wondered if their is peace in his soul while all of that is going on within him. I wondered what he was feeling & what he was thinking. Could he hear me tell him that I love him? Could he see me beside him? Could he feel my touch?

Each day I ask God to use us. To use our family to minister in some way to someone. On the way up to the ER today I asked God to use us.

Not sure if he used us for the nurses or the doctors we have seen but I hope He did. I had to move the van & coming back up to the PICU I rode the elevator with a dad whose 14 year old son had a stroke at school on Monday. He is being transferred to Scottish Rite tomorrow to the rehab unit. As we stood out in the hall talking my heart was breaking. It all happened so quickly which I am thankful for because I had no time to get in the way or think about what I was going to say, who else was around or who was watching. God's words, God's timing, God's plan & God's will. My heart is heavy tonight for this 14 year old boy named Jackson & his family. You may have seen it on the news. Please lift them up in your prayers!!!

Well I am about to ask for another blanket. I don't know what the temp is in here but you could hang meat. They are keeping it cold because of Abe's fever. I am freezing. Please keep Abe in your prayers. Also please pray for Mike & the girls!

At least they gave Abe a Mickey mask. He wanted me to take a picture so his sissy could see it. They also gave him Cars diapers but I don't think he wants me to share that picture with ya'll!!!